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Bits & Pieces - T.O. & Housewives, the BC Times & a Weekend of TV Sports

It's Becoming More and More Difficult to Watch Television

November 21, 2004       Leave a Comment
By: O. J. Cunningham

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Joey Tribiani -- 'If you don't have a TV, how do you know where to point your furniture?'
 

Friends' popular 'home-boy', Joey Tribiani said it best. In Tribiani's special take on Television popularity and place in our 2004 culture . . .


Tribiani asked all too innocently: "What do you mean, you don't have a television in your living room! How do you know which way to point your furniture?"

It's been a long week for television viewers.
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Beauty and the Beast - It all started with ABC's Monday Night Football. ABC has one of the highest-rated shows of the 2004 Fall season - Desperate Housewives, 9:00 PM, Sunday. But, television producers can never really satisfied with just a "share" of the Sunday night audience, or any audience. I guess ABCexecutives wanted more.

So they decided to mix Nicolette Sheridan (Desperate Housewives) with Terrell Owens (Philadelphia Eagles football) in a television "promo" at the start of Monday Night Football. This is the same NFL that prides itself on family values, service to the United Way and hours of quality time spent in the community. This is the same ABC owned by Walt Disney. What were they thinking?

At 9:00 PM Eastern, 8:00 PM Central, 7:00 PM Mountain and 6:00 pm California time (Gee, perhaps families were just sitting down to Sunday dinner), the ABC execs offered for our viewing pleasure - a semi-naked, dirty-flirty, towel-clad Ms. Sheridan and a googley-eyed, pervy-looking Terrell Owens in a desperate skit designed to hype Desperate Housewives.

What were they thinking? I thought everybody's already watching Desperate Housewives (It's on Sunday night right before Boston Legal with James Spader).

I keep trying to imagine the brainstorming session that resulted in the decision that this skit could EVER be a good publicity stunt. I'm glad my kids are off at college. At least I didn't have to explain it to a 10 year-old son or daughter over Sunday dinner at Grandma's.

Well Jessica, er, ah,uh, it's like this. They're not REALLY naked. It's just an advertisement.
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The Bay City Times - I want to personally thank the Bay City Times for their new packaging and organization of the Sunday edition.

Seriously . . . I know some of you are thinking . . . well you know what you're thinking.

But I'm serious when I say that I found the Parade Magazine with no problem. REALLY! I found it, like, right away.Why would I lie? Usually it takes me 10 to 15 minutes to sort through all the inserts to find the Parade Magazine. But now ALL the inserts are inside the comics. My Sunday newspaper just got better.
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The BasketBRAWL at the Palace - I hope Indiana Pacers' Forward, Ron Artest doesn't read this. I think Artest is a bad apple. Today, the NBA Commissioner is going to come down like the "Hammer of Doom" on Artest's NBA career.

I've watched that game-ending BasketBRAWL over and over and over. Artest flagrant fouled Ben Wallace. I know he did because he was laughing at Wallace after the Piston All-Star pushed Artest in the chest after the foul. Artest's face was saying to Wallace, "Boy are you ever stupid for pushing me."

Artest was in no way interested in fighting with Wallace. In fact, Artest knew (watch for the smirk on Artest's face) that Wallace was the loser. Artest KNEW that Wallace was going to be ejected from the game for shoving him (Artest).

In the middle of the bench-clearing ruckus, Artest lays out on the scorer's table, hands behind his head and gloats. His posture and demeanor cries out - "Look what I did to Ben Wallace!"

But he had already crossed the line. He was already in the stands with the fans. And what followed was inevitable. Wallace and the others will certainly be suspended. Mr. Artest is going to be banned for the rest of the 2004-05 NBA season. I personally won't miss him.

In the meantime, I'm going to keep my furniture pointed at the television.

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O. J. Cunningham

O. J. Cunningham is the Publisher of MyBayCity.com. Cunningham previously published Sports Page & Bay City Enterprise. He is the President/CEO of OJ Advertising, Inc.

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