Thinking Out Loud
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There is something self-defeating in the too-conscious pursuit of pleasure. ~ Max Eastman
I wanted to make the most of the day.
I woke up this morning with the intent of being either very productive, or in lieu of the motivation to do more household chores, then at least to find something fun to do, SOMEWHERE.
It wasn't until I looked up at the clock and saw it read 4pm, that I realized I had pretty much lost my window of opportunity of time for productivity OR entertainment.
Initially, I was a little annoyed with myself for letting the day slip away me.
Tomorrow it's back to work Monday and here I had let an opportunity pass to get in another game of golf this month. Or jump in my car and head to Port Crescent beach, like I have been wanting to all summer.
I could have coaxed one of my brothers for a ride on their boat this sunny beautiful day. Maybe by 'guilting' them and holding over their head all the times they disobeyed me when our folks were out and I was the babysitter. (Or "THE LAW AROUND HERE" as I liked to think of myself at those times.)
Or a bike ride on the Rail Trail with friend and a stop for dinner along our route.
I meant to use this day from start to finish and wring out every bit and piece of fun I could, before the weekend has officially passed and the "darn, it's over" blues kicked in.
But instead, I found myself at 4pm on my deck, sitting at my new, end of season bargain-priced patio set, with a laptop in front of me.
Rather than invite myself to a friends picnic, pool or use of their jet skis, as I maybe should have, I had let the day float away as surely as the clouds that made their trek across the sky all afternoon.
It dawned on me that I had virtually spent the better part of the day hanging out in my 'not for public view' sun dress, bare feet, hair in a disheveled bun and a lip gloss-less face.
Instead of seeing the latest movie, mall shopping for a new pair of fall boots or talking a walk along the River, I inadvertently chose to be the epitome of "chilling out" at home.
I spent several hours outside in sunny, 86 degree temps, with a beautiful, cooling breeze that continually blew in at just the knick of time, to refresh hot skin. All while I caught up on some writing projects and sipped at the tart, sweet lemonade in front me.
An afternoon of earphones and my favorite songs on my IPod, using the power of music therapy to get my blood pumping and fuel creativity, as I watched the butterflies battle the bees for first dibs on the colorful flowers on my deck.
I had instead, used the day to hang out in slobbish glory, by myself and enjoying my own company. All while taking deep breaths of the world around me and tuning out the worries of tomorrow.
Completely relaxing 'Like a Boss'.
In spite of never getting more than 100 feet away from my house, I believe hours spent like this still qualifies as, 'making the most of the day".
It could be that instead of constantly looking for entertainment in scheduled formats, pre-planned parties or amusement agendas, we can find pleasure sometimes just by looking outside the box and recognizing it when we discover it.
I never went further than my deck to find mine today.
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Diane Szczepanski |
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