www.mybaycity.com November 23, 2008
Columns Article 3298


OJ SAYS: If you're fed up with the Detroit Lions, you will probably enjoy the video at the end of this column.

I Know Nothing About Football
Except That I Know NOTHING About Football

Wolverines, Irish, Spartans, Red Raiders and Lions All Come Up Short

November 23, 2008
By: O. J. Cunningham


In a previous life, I knew plenty about football -- both college and pro. Not so much, these days.

Here's how I spent my weekend . . .

  • Ohio State 42 -- Michigan 7
  • Penn State 49 -- Michigan State 18
  • Syracuse 24 -- Notre Dame 23
  • Oklahoma 65 -- Texas Tech 21
  • Tampa Bay 38 -- %*$#@ Lions 20

    Good Grief . . .

    NOON: I began Saturday on an optimistic note. Big Game. Big Rivalry. Should be low-scoring defensive struggle. Go Blue! (NOPE: The Michigan game was over before it started.)

    2:45PM: At least I'll be able to enjoy the Irish putting a major beatdown on lowly 2-8 Syracuse. Lucky for Charlie Weiss that he has Syracuse to kick around before getting his buttocks spanked at USC in the last game of the year.

    When I turned off the Notre Dame game, (To join fellow football junkies at Rattlesnake Ricks to watch Penn State/MSU) Weiss's troops were ahead 23-10. My math skills were predicting a 40-20 final. Go Irish!

    3:45PM: Before we could get a pitcher of beer and an order of hot wings, it was 7-0, 14-0, 21-0 and 28-0. Snow was falling and the MSU Spartans looked like a rag-tag flag football pickup team that got dropped off at the wrong stadium. Go Sparty!

    6:00PM: SAY WHAT? SYRACUSE WHAT? Since all the TVs at Rattlesnake Ricks were tuned into the massacre at Happy Valley, I had no idea that the "worm had turned" in South Bend after I turned off my TV. In some way, I'm glad I didn't get to watch the meltdown at the Golden Dome.

    At least (note the sarcasm) Notre Dame records were set. It's the first time in the history of Notre Dame football that a 2-8 team has defeated the Fighting Irish. (As it turned out, even the students were throwing snowballs at the players in South Bend.

    8:00PM It was time for the shoot-out at Norman. . .

    OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO . . . not a again . . . not the Red Raiders too . . .

    Somehow, my Texas Tech Red Raiders forgot to bring their A-Game to Norman, Oklahoma. The previously former lock for the Heisman Trophy, T-Tech's Graham Harrel, played the entire game in a daze. Harrell, who was completing passes at a 71% clip, ended the night with 33/55 for 361 yards and 3 touchdowns. But the bulk of his numbers came well after the game was out of reach -- Oklahoma led 42-7 at halftime.

    Coach Bob Stoops of Oklahoma said he wasn't surprised at the outcome. "We've played them before," Stoops said, refusing to even allow that Texas Tech had a chance against his Sooners. Go Stoops!

    NOON SUNDAY: I figured to blow off the rest of the weekend watching the Lions and Tampa only to find out that Lions' fans are FINALLY getting fed up. There is no "sell-out" and the game is blacked out on WSMH FOX 66 . . .

    I start tracking the game online (CNNSI) and get sucked in (again) when the Lions roll to a 17 point lead in the first quarter. But alas, the inevitable follows and the %*$#@ Lions falter and take yet another drubbing. I finished off my weekend of sports idiocy sitting alone in front of a television set (munching pretzels) on a Sunday afternoon, watching former Cheesehead Bret Favre dismantle the previously unbeaten Tennessee Titans 34-13. I was pulling for the Titans to remain undefeated -- Imagine That!

    On a somber note . . . I bet the Titans will have their "game faces" on for the Thanksgiving Thursday afternoon SMACK DOWN of the team "once-upon-a-time" known as a professional football team -- the %*$#@ Lions.

    If you're as fed up up with the %*$#@ Lions as I am, you might enjoy the following video excerpt from TriCity Buzz Television which can be seen on Charter Main Street six times each week.



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