www.mybaycity.com
September 25, 2011
That's Funny Article 6302
Honest Bumper Stickers
September 25, 2011
By: O. J. Cunningham
-- All men are idiots, and I married their king.
-- Your kid may be an honors student, but you're still an idiot.
-- I brake for no apparent reason.
-- Time is what keeps everything from happening all at once.
-- Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
-- I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
-- Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.
-- Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
-- I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
-- Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off NOW.
-- Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
-- Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
-- Puritanism: the haunting fear that someone somewhere may be happy.
-- Consciousness cuts into my napping.
-- Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
-- There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.
-- Keep honking. I'm reloading.
ONE FOR THE ROAD
A woman visits a fortuneteller who tells her, "Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year."
Visibly shaken, the woman takes a few deep breaths, steadies her voice and asks, "Will I be acquitted?"
__________________________________
0202 nd 04-25-2024
|