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Issue 1331 September 25, 2011
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Honest Bumper Stickers

September 25, 2011       Leave A Comment
By: O. J. Cunningham

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  • -- All men are idiots, and I married their king.
  • -- Your kid may be an honors student, but you're still an idiot.
  • -- I brake for no apparent reason.
  • -- Time is what keeps everything from happening all at once.
  • -- Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
  • -- I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
  • -- Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.
  • -- Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
  • -- I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
  • -- Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off NOW.
  • -- Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
  • -- Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
  • -- Puritanism: the haunting fear that someone somewhere may be happy.
  • -- Consciousness cuts into my napping.
  • -- Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
  • -- There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.
  • -- Keep honking. I'm reloading.

    ONE FOR THE ROAD


    A woman visits a fortuneteller who tells her, "Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year."

    Visibly shaken, the woman takes a few deep breaths, steadies her voice and asks, "Will I be acquitted?" __________________________________
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    Agree? or Disagree?

    O. J. Cunningham

    O. J. Cunningham is the Publisher of MyBayCity.com. Cunningham previously published Sports Page & Bay City Enterprise. He is the President/CEO of OJ Advertising, Inc.

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