www.mybaycity.com October 28, 2009
Columns Article 4312

What Starts With "F" and Ends in "K"?

(Isn't That a Great Headline?)

October 28, 2009
By: O. J. Cunningham


A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?"

"I'm too smart for the 1st grade," Harry answered. "My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"

Ms.. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the Principal's office.

While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained the situation to the Principal.

The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If the boy failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave.

Ms. Brooks agreed.

Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: 'Harry, what is 3 x 3?'

Harry: '9.'

Principal: 'What is 6 x 6?'

Harry: '36.'

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know...

The principal looked at Ms. Brooks and told her, 'I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade.'

Ms. Brooks frowned and said to the principal, 'Let me ask him some questions.'

The principal and Harry both agreed.

Ms. Brooks asked, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?'

Harry, after a moment: 'Legs.'

Ms Brooks: 'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?'

The principal wondered why would Ms. Brooks ask such a question!

Harry replied: 'Pockets.'

Ms. Brooks: 'What does a dog do that a man steps into?'

Harry: 'Pants.'

The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.

Ms. Brooks: 'What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?'

The Principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer . . .

Harry replied, 'Bubble gum.'

Ms. Brooks: 'What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?'

Harry: 'Shake hands.'

The principal was trembling.

Ms.. Brooks: 'What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?'

Harry: 'Firetruck.'

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told Ms. Brooks, 'Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong.'

------------------- One More For The Road -----------------------------

Teacher: If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

STUDENT: Seven!

Teacher: No, listen carefully again. If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

STUDENT: Seven!

Teacher: Let?s try this another way. If I give you two apples and two apples and another two apples, how many apples have you got?

STUDENT: Six.

Teacher: Good. Now if I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

STUDENT: Seven!

Teacher: How on earth do you work out that three lots of two rabbits is seven?

STUDENT: I've already got one rabbit at home now!

0202 nd 10-15-2019

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